


My heart beats soft

by Totally_Legit



Category: GOT7
Genre: 2Jae, AU, Clothed Sex, Lil angsty, M/M, Smut, Soft Im Jaebum | JB, Strangers to Lovers, partially, soft
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-02
Updated: 2020-02-02
Packaged: 2021-02-27 19:55:17
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,645
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22531312
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Totally_Legit/pseuds/Totally_Legit
Summary: Jaebum takes a pretty guy to his hotel room. Pretty simple.
Relationships: Choi Youngjae/Im Jaebum | JB
Comments: 12
Kudos: 64





	My heart beats soft

**Author's Note:**

> This has no affiliation with that similarly named fic.
> 
> This was simply my filth-relief writing. I was just feeling for something very soft. It may have gotten a little angsty along the way and then in the end it drawled off into... whatever that is? But yeah. I wrote these parallel. Hence the name.
> 
> This is just me being soft. Leave your thoughts in the comments, I value honest feedback, even criticism. <3

„So, what d‘you like?“ Youngjae asked as he whirled around from where he’d watched the heavy door fall shut with a loud ‘click’. Jaebum, having walked a few steps into the room paused and turned to look at him. Youngjae’s eyes were wide, sparkling with excitement while they looked at each other. “What?” tumbled out of Jaebum’s mouth, a little breathless.

Youngjae tilted his face sideways cutely and the smile lingering on his lips didn’t fade. “How do you wanna do this?” He asked curiously. Jaebum shifted on his feet. Words were on his tongue, but they were messy and he didn’t really know how to order them. The fast-forwardness startled him. “I don’t…” He managed to get out but trailed off. And the fact that Youngjae took one, two steps closer didn’t help.

“You top or bottom?” Youngjae elaborated. Jaebum’s stomach plummeted. Oh. “Oh…” He made quietly. Something furry rumbled around in his guts. Of course. “Hmh?” Youngjae nudged, still smiling brightly, still pretty and flirty. “I’m versatile.” He added on, the underlying promise so clear and open.

It was overburdening Jaebum. He shifted more, bit down on his bottom lip. His whole posture must have been showing off insecurity. He didn’t. He couldn’t s peak . Couldn’t make sense of words. It wasn’t exactly a novelty, of course. Jaebum has always had a hard time adjusting to situations like this. Which is why he did it so rarely. He couldn’t even remember the last time he had sex, let alone with a stranger. Hookups weren’t his thing.

But Youngjae was so pretty. The flirt had happened more or less naturally. Jaebum hadn’t been able to help himself. Since the moment he’d laid eyes on the beautiful person and listened in to the contagious, obnoxious laugh that didn’t seem to really match his angelic features he’d just been smitten. He’d kind of approached him on autopilot and to his absolute shock, Youngjae had in fact flirted back. Playful and a little teasing but he had.

And then Jaebum’s imagination had run havoc. Of course he’d fantasized of taking Youngjae back to his room. He’d imagined a detailed version of what could happen if they went back together while he’d been staring at Youngjae’s lips moving as he spoke. His mind had been spinning during the fleeting touches to his shoulder, his arm and his sturdy back. When Youngjae asked him if he was staying at the hotel, if he had a room upstairs, Jaebum was on the verge of passing out.

But that was a fantasy. And the thing about fantasies was that they happened exactly the way he wanted without having to actually work for it.

Now he was standing there, Youngjae a meter away with an expectant look in his eyes and waiting for him to make a decision. And it was an important, yet restricted decision. He averted his eyes and looked down at the ground, eyeing Youngjae’s expensive shoes. “Dunno…” He mumbled eventually.

Youngjae bent sideways at the waist, hanging his head down in the most outrageous display of cuteness until he was far down enough to catch Jaebum’s gaze. “Where’s that confidence gone?” He asked, not upset, just playful and with the same teasing undertone he’d been playing hard to get with when Jaebum first approached him. Maybe it’d never been there in the first place. Yes, Jaebum was confident in his skills, his looks, his charm. But he wasn’t confident in social interactions. Not when they steered down the path of intimacy at least.

He shrugged casually, even though he felt his face warm up. “You don’t know what you’re into?” Youngjae inquired, straightening back up and Jaebum’s eyes involuntarily followed him. He shrugged again. “Are you straight?” Youngjae prodded, his eyebrows pulled into a frown, but somehow that didn’t remove the smirk from his lips and eyes. Jaebum’s mouth popped open in confusion. “I mean.” Youngjae kept going “Are you “straight”?” He lifted his arms to draw the quotation marks in the air with his fingers.

Jaebum just shook his head, mouth still hanging open in surprise. “Just wondering.-” This time it was Youngjae who shrugged. “-If you haven’t had any experiences with guys yet, because.-“ And he looked at him meaningful. “-That would be okay.”

“No.” Jaebum finally found his voice again. “No, I’m… I have. I’m…” He stuttered, unable to come up with a reasonable lie so he settled for something that was at least quite true. “I’m just not… very experienced with uhm… casual… hook-ups?” He shifted uncomfortably again, cringing internally, but Youngjae burst into a small, cheerful laughter. “Oh.” He made. “Okay.” And he nodded. “I was just trying to make sure we’re on the same page.” He elaborated and stepped closer. “So that we both enjoy it.”

Jaebum’s heart sped up infinitely when he moved in and he finally shut his mouth, so that he could chew on his bottom lip nervously. Youngjae was so close now that he could just reach out his arm and touch him anywhere if he wanted. Or if he dared. But it was Youngjae again who lifted his arm and placed his hand against his cheek. Jaebum almost doubled over at the simple touch. It was so gentle and his palm so warm and his thumb brushed along his lip to tug it out from between his teeth.

He felt and heard his own breath shudder, almost his eyelids fell close, but he caught them just so. “I…” Youngjae explained quietly. “… normally prefer to bottom, if that would be alright with you...” He trailed off, but didn’t remove his hand from his jaw and it distracted Jaebum too much. Not that he would otherwise have been able to express himself properly. The pitiful “No…” Came out on its own and for a moment, or a few, his eyes did flutter shut when he felt the pads of Youngjae’s fingers brush along the hairline behind his ear.

“No?” Youngjae repeated and Jaebum who just realized what he’d said tore his eyes back open and gasped. “Yes.” Youngjae’s eyes were still sparkling in the warm light. “No.” Jaebum made, his chest contracting painfully.

He almost screamed when Youngjae took his hand back and their contact broke. “You do remember that it was you who asked me to your room, right?” Youngjae asked and finally his smile had vanished, but his frown hadn’t. “To have sex with me, right?” Jaebum, eyes wide open, nodded. “Do you still… want that?” It happened involuntarily again, it stumbled out between his lips without thinking. “No…”

Youngjae looked perplexed to put it mildly. Jaebum panicked. “Yes!” He yelped soundless. They stared at each other. Jaebum wanted this man so bad. It almost physically hurt. “I don’t…” He breathed helplessly. “Can I sit?” He watched Youngjae startle, beautiful eyes narrowed in confusion. “Of course.” He answered puzzled. Jaebum, who was sure he was going to black out any time now, whose knees were wobbly, stumbled backwards on shaky legs and sunk down on the corner of the bed. He took deep breaths to calm his racing heart, but it didn’t do much.

He stared blankly ahead, now on height with Youngjae’s middle. His eyes traced the trim of his loose T-shirt that he had tucked into his skin-tight jeans in the front. It looked stylish, trendy, the complete opposite of Jaebum’s groomed, dressed-up appearance with his button-down and slacks. He just realized that he had no idea what Youngjae was in the city for. Or maybe he had and hadn’t listened for the answer? He certainly wasn’t on a business-trip like Jaebum if he was dressed like that.

“Jaebummie?” He was torn from his wandering thoughts and a shiver that ran down from his scalp all the way to the tips of his toes. What happened? He eyes darted up to find Youngjae’s confused face. Now nothing of his initial cheerfulness was left. “Are you alright?” He questioned, doubt evident in his voice. Jaebum shook his head, then nodded. Youngjae huffed. “Are you sure you even want this?” Youngjae just kept asking and asking and it made Jaebum sick in the stomach. He had no answers, didn’t he understand that yet? “Are you drunk?”

This time Jaebum shook his head firmly. He wasn’t. He’s only had one glass of wine for dinner. He was sure of it. “You don’t want this?” Youngjae repeated and made Jaebum’s head spin. “Not drunk.” He explained grumpily. “Want… this. You…” He cringed over himself and snorted. Why couldn’t he function like a normal human being?

“You’re very cute.” Youngjae stated and luckily it wasn’t a question for once and Jaebum looked up again to find his eyes even though he couldn’t remember looking away. And he felt himself blush further, but he also noticed that most of the confidence had been wiped away from Youngjae’s stance. “But I don’t know what to do.” Jaebum pressed his lips together helplessly. He didn’t know either. Youngjae had thrown him off the rail with his immediate questioning on sex-positions. He kind of knew what he wanted, he just didn’t know how to ask for it.

“Can we just… take it slow?” He eventually managed to get out, quite proud of himself. Relief washed over Youngjae’s features. “Of course.” He walked closer and slowly, very slowly as if he was afraid of scaring off a small animal he placed his butt on the corner of the bed right next to him. Jaebum felt the heat creep up from where their arms brushed together. He desperately wanted to feel Youngjae’s hands on him, like when he cradled his face. But his brain was exhausted from the constant demand to come up with words.

He felt a movement and looked over, only to find Youngjae flinging his shoes off his feet, revealing mismatched socks, one grey and one dark blue. Jaebum meant to copy him, dug his toes behind the heel of his other foot to shove his shoes off, but unlike Youngjae he wasn’t wearing sneakers and they were tied too tightly and wouldn’t budge. He wasn’t sure if he’d manage to actually bend down to take them off, because he was feeling dizzy and wasn’t sure he could lean down without falling over. But he didn’t have to.

Youngjae made a quiet chuckling sound and leaned forward. He grabbed Jaebum’s leg by the knee making him shudder and lifted it off the ground. The way his palm slid down the length of his leg until he got hold of his ankle had him actually hum in content. Youngjae’s eyes flickered back at him briefly, curiously before he pulled the shoelaces open with his free hand and slipped the shoe off his foot.

Jaebum didn’t want to think about how his breathing labored from simply being stripped of his shoes. He just wanted to enjoy it, when Youngjae processed his other leg in the same manner, slow and careful and setting his socked foot down onto the fluffy carpet. His hand however he left lingering on his thigh, right above his knee. It distracted Jaebum wholly, it felt a bit as if he was liquid, his body only solid where it was connected to Youngjae’s hand.

“Off to a good start.” Youngjae whispered, his voice so close to Jaebum’s ear, he was hyperaware of how his breath caressed the unshielded expanse of his neck. Jaebum turned his head towards him, it wasn’t voluntary, it was just an instinctive, basic need, like a flower tilting towards the sun. Youngjae’s warm hand traveled up and across his thighs, around his hips until it settled nicely on his lower back. “May I kiss you?” He asked calmly and GOD yes. Jaebum nodded and Youngjae didn’t hesitate to lean in to him, he made it just a few centimeters forward before Jaebum’s eyes fluttered shut on their own.

The seconds stretched into eternities painfully as he waited for their lips to connect, covered in darkness filled with warmth and anticipation and the sound of their breathing mingling together. It was electric, when Youngjae’s soft lips brushed his own. He couldn’t help the way his body tensed, made him shiver, but he kept his head still, too scared to break the contact again. It was so chaste and gentle, how Youngjae nudged against him, the most basic and sane version of a kiss and it honestly made Jaebum’s heart flutter. It was hard to ignore how it had his lips tingle, sizzling energy traveling along his skin.

They kissed sweetly, once Jaebum collected enough sanity to respond, carefully moving his lips back against Youngjae and once he did he realized Youngjae must have been waiting for him, because as soon as he got a reaction out of him he pressed into it harder. Mildly Jaebum wondered how long that had taken, but he couldn’t dwell on it, because Youngjae tilted his head and scooted closer. Jaebum could feel it even with his eyes closed that his body moved in on him, their legs bumping together, the pressure of his hand tightening on his back. It felt urgent and sexual and scared the shit out of Jaebum. 

Thus, when he felt Youngjae’s wet, perky tongue slip out between his teeth and nudge against his lips he bailed. With a gasp he couldn’t contain he tore his head away, eyes flying open just to stare at the opposite wall with a racing heart. He left out a puff of air, exhaustion sprinkled with a hint of frustration. He was going to say something, apologize maybe for panicking so randomly, but Youngjae was faster.

“Okay.” He whispered and then his hand was back against his cheek, a gentle pressure against his jaw to tilt his head back. Jaebum’s breath hitched and all words he thought he might possessed were lost in the void of his mind. “Sorry. Okay. No tongue, got it.” Then his lips were back as he kissed him again, just as sweet and gentle as before and he didn’t get his tongue involved this time. Jaebum felt like melting away, he felt trapped, sort of, but in a good way. Youngjae’s hands caging him in on his back and his face where his palm felt so soft and warm and comforting. And they kissed.

And Jaebum, to his own surprise, eventually grew bored. Youngjae had some damn patience admittedly, but Jaebum felt like he wanted something more, even though he wasn’t sure what. He untangled his hands that he had subconsciously been kneading in his lap in order to reach for something to touch. He found Youngjae’s chest, stroked down until his palms could settle around his waist. Holding on to it he broke the kiss, found Youngjae’s eyes looking at him contemplating.

His fingers against his cheeks slowly, very lightly wandered down his jaw and neck, the butterfly like touch spreading goosebumps from its origin all the way over Jaebum’s skin. Youngjae stroked down his throat all while looking at him intently and eventually his fingertips settled gently around the top button of his shirt. And there he paused, looked at him, waited. Jaebum looked back, heart beating in his throat, skin tingling where Youngjae’s fingers touched, even through the fabric of his shirt.

He understood. He knew why Youngjae was looking like that, knew that he was waiting for permission and Jaebum wanted to give it, really. He knew all he had to do was nod, tell him ‘Yeah, it’s okay to undress me’ but he couldn’t. Not because he didn’t want it, because he really wanted it. He wanted to be bare, naked under Youngjae’s gaze, but he couldn’t get himself to say yes. They stared at each other for an eternity, Jaebum getting more and more nervous, jittery, his fingers clenching around Youngjae’s waist, noticing that underneath his T-Shirt his muscles were tight, rendering his round cheeks and soft features a total lie.

Youngjae was so close, his pretty face filled the entirety of his field of view when his fingers got back into motion, slowly but surely popping the first of Jaebum’s buttons. He shivered, the abundance of sensations a little overwhelming for his bare nerves. But as he didn’t move a muscle to stop it from happening, Youngjae’s hand slipped down to the next button. Then the next, quicker and quicker, flicking them loose expertly one-handed and blind, because Youngjae didn’t take his eyes off his face.

Which meant Jaebum didn’t miss the tiny smirk that tugged on the corners of his beautiful lips, when his stomach muscles flexed involuntarily under the barely-there touch and then again when the last button came undone and Youngjae placed his palm flat on his belly and stroked all the way back up to his collar. Jaebum was positively shivering, but it was in a good way, even when Youngjae brought his other hand up to slip his fingers under the top of his shirt and gently slid it off his shoulders.

He had to take away his hands from holding on to Youngjae to let him get it all the way, then he pulled it off and dropped it to the floor, leaving Jaebum in his flimsy undershirt. He was equally terrified and excited and when Youngjae’s palm stroked up his naked arm he was sure he could feel his goosebumps. This was it, Jaebum thought. Just right, the way gentle hands traveled up to his shoulders and then back down his front. A sweet touch, almost so light that it would tickle, but not really.

Youngjae hesitated again, when his fingertips snuck under the hem of his shirt, he halted, waited, curiosity in the way he looked at him. Jaebum stared back, sucking heavy breaths through his parted lips, heart pounding in his ears. He understood, Youngjae, that no ‘no’ meant ‘yes’. It might’ve been the best thing that ever happened to Jaebum, because he lifted his shirt up carefully, up up and Jaebum’s arms followed until he could pull it over his head, leaving his chest bare and unshielded.

He was scared and vulnerable, but it only lasted for a moment, because Youngjae set his palms onto his chest, they were soft and warm and he murmured low and quiet. “So handsome.” Jaebum breathed shakily, his senses tingled under the touch and he felt his pants tighten slowly when gentle fingers danced over his skin. Youngjae mapped out his ribs, his collarbones and the subtle ripples of his stomach, no specific area in particular, just everywhere, even when Jaebum gasped and shook when his fingertips ghosted over his stiffened nipples.

Jaebum wanted to say it, tell him that he was perfect, but his throat was blocked and the bulge in his pants was growing from every little touch. “Looks like someone’s coming out to say hello.” Youngjae let him know, the ghost of a smile on his beautiful lips and one of his caressing hands moved down, slipping over the front of his slacks and cupping him through the layers of fabric. It was enough to have him breathe out a sound, somewhere in between needy and terrified. There was barely any pressure, the touch as chaste as the others, but it had Jaebum heat up almost infinitely.

Youngjae leaned in closer, so close that their cheeks brushed together when he reached for his ear. “I got you.” He whispered. “Won’t you lie down on the bed?” Jaebum’s breath hitched. Yes. Yes he wanted to. Youngjae let go of him so he had enough brain capacity to scoot backwards up the bed, a little clumsy, but he managed and let himself sink down into the sheets, head comfortably placed on the fluffy pillow. “You’re so pure.” Youngjae murmured as he watched closely, eyes scanning the stretch of his body. Jaebum squirmed in discomfort and arousal alike. “Am not…” he protested, it was weak, but Youngjae heard.

He smiled when he crawled after and leaned over him. “No?” He asked but it was insincere as he was distracted putting his hands back on his body in an instant, stripping Jaebum brain of the ability to function. This time around, Youngjae didn’t randomly touch him though. He let his fingers wander constantly downwards all the way past his belly button and despite the way Jaebum gasped and tensed when he reached the hem of his pants, he popped open the button and pulled down the zipper.

His length was already asking for attention, tenting his underwear up through the crack and Jaebum’s mind blanked when Youngjae touched him. The pads of his fingers nudging against the bulge, nowhere in particular, just wherever he could reach through the confines of his fly and it was too much. Jaebum’s eyes screwed shut, breathy exhale being forced from his lungs and his hips kicked up against the gentle pressure, meeting Youngjae’s palm and making him shiver.

He whined when Youngjae removed his hand almost immediately and he looked down to see why, chest contracting in fear. “Let us get these off first, okay…?” He heard him murmur, lips barely moving, but a tense expression on his face and he hooked into Jaebum’s waistband, slacks and briefs together to pull them down. Jaebum took a sharp, shuddery breath, mind tumbling over, his subconsciousness a hair’s width away from panicking out, jumping up, batting Youngjae’s prodding hands away and making a run for it.

He didn’t. He breathed through it, fighting his instincts, gritting his teeth while his brain traced the fabric dragging along the expanse of his legs, too uncomfortable against his sensitive skin, but he knew it would be better when it was off. He heard the soft sound of his pants falling to the carpet and there wasn’t a breath in between that and Youngjae’s fingers around his feet again, taking off his socks.

Jaebum’s toes curled inwards when he felt them brush the sole of his foot, ticklish, but nice, but it also took too long. He saw the smile on Youngjae’s concentrated face when he watched his toes flex and roll and figured he was taking it extra slow, but it took too long. He kicked his foot out of Youngjae’s grip, immediately regretting it when the contract broke and then whined about it. Youngjae’s face lifted up to him, curiosity seeping into the stoic expression and he watched him closely while he placed his palm back against his leg, wrapping around his ankle as far as his fingers could reach, easing the tension that Jaebum hadn’t really noticed building up inside him while also bringing back the nervousness.

Youngjae crawled back upwards, leaving his hand connected and stroking up his leg slowly in the process. He made it up to his knee before Jaebum’s thighs twitched and his eyes clouded. “Huh…” Youngjae acknowledged quietly, eyeing him curiously. His touch slowed even further, torturously so in a way that got Jaebum tingly all over, cock twitching pathetically against his belly.

Youngjae’s hand was so solid against his skin, so obnoxiously  _there_ that he allowed his eyes to flutter shut again, relish in the simple touch. He heard Youngjae’s quiet hum and squeezed his eyes a little tighter, unable to decipher what it could mean. But his palm kept gliding up his leg unbothered, so he tried to relax into the sheets, but the apparent arousal had him tense and shiver and it was absolutely perfect.

His breath hitched when the gentle tips of Youngjae’s fingers neared his private parts, splayed out to cover as much skin as possible from the front to the sensitive inside of his thigh. He really tried to control the squirming, somewhere between embarrassed and terrified of making a mistake and Youngjae seemed to notice. “Shhh, relax.” He whispered and then he had Jaebum whimper helplessly when he added. “I got you.”

Arousal and shame burned scorching hot in his guts, spreading through his body and warming his cheeks and ears, but Youngjae didn’t comment on how he was rock hard and desperate from barely being touched. He didn’t exactly touch him  _intimately_ either. Once he reached the top of his legs, thumbs resting in the crooks, just shy of grazing his balls, he followed the line of his groin and over his hipbones. He pressed the tips rather harshly into the skin right underneath the bone in a way a massage therapist might treat your shoulder blades.

He hissed quietly, but the moment was so short he couldn’t dwell on it as Youngjae’s palms already wandered further, stroking gently up his waist and stomach. “You have a good body.” Youngjae let him know and Jaebum wondered if he opened his eyes whether he’d see him smirk, because he brushed past his ribs and cupped his pecs, having him suck in a harsh breath and raise his chest, pressing into the touch.

Jaebum squirmed when he circled his nipples with his thumbs, not harsh, but not teasing either. Just solid. He left one hand continuing that task and dragged the other up to his neck, playing his fingers against his skin and pressing his thumb against his jaw before rubbing behind his ear and sliding through his hair. It was just so… Jaebum gasped, arched his back up against the pleasurable pressure to his nipple and stretched his head back. It was so on point. So random and perfect and he was sure he’d never felt like this before.

He might have whimpered, which caused Youngjae to answer with a choked sound and then there was a sudden pressure against Jaebum’s lower body, jeans clad hips pushing down on him and when had Youngjae climbed on top of him and why was he so close and so much tightness?

It was too much, Jaebum’s formerly relaxed body convulsed, he snapped upright, pushing against the predator in his lap, throwing him away and with a startled cry he flopped down into the sheets.

“Ouch, dang.” Youngjae commented from his place on the mattress while Jaebum’s body shivered and his chest heaved. The sudden panic flowed off quickly, but it left a cold sting in his chest and a ringing in his ears. How fucking embarrassing. He nervously (and in somewhat of a stagnant state of arousal) kneaded his own thighs, avoiding to look at Youngjae’s face. “I’m sorry.” He muttered.

A soft, warm palm came to lie on his upper arm, making his tense muscles relax against every logic. There were no words to describe how desperately Jaebum didn’t want Youngjae to stop touching him. “Do you want to stop?” Youngjae asked softly and Jaebum couldn’t shake his head fast enough. “No, please.” He croaked. “Don’t… Don’t stop.” And in a rush of adrenaline and fear he did something he never thought himself capable of. He reached out and grabbed Youngjae’s dick.

Right there, on top of his jeans he palmed his crotch and squeezed through the denim and listened to his rough moan of surprise. “Whatever happens.” Jaebum whispered. “Please don’t stop. Whatever I do… Keep going.” Through the layers of fabric Youngjae felt good in his hand, even though he was jittery and nervous and unsure if he did any good.

Youngjae’s  hips rubbed back against his palm and his eyes were hazy when Jaebum finally looked at his face. “How am I gonna be able to when you throw me away?” He asked, but it wasn’t accusing. At least that’s what Jaebum heard, maybe because he wanted to hear it. “Just…” He muttered, “Just go back to how you did before… I…” He trailed off, losing his confidence and retrieving his hand back into his own lap. Youngjae’s was still warm against his biceps. Then, slowly, he nodded.

He placed his other hand in the middle of his chest and pushed him back down until Jaebum was lying in his original spot, all naked and tense and Youngjae stroked down his front and leaned in to place his lips beneath his throat. Jaebum might as well be called the luckiest person on the planet. Youngjae had every right to walk out the door and hell, he wouldn’t have been the first.

Jaebum has been accused of many things. Not caring about his partner’s pleasure, inability to communicate, selfishness. And maybe all of them were true. He sighed when Youngjae’s fingers ghosted over his abs, just enough vicinity to his p r ivates that it had his arousal pick back up. But no one has ever been this willing to accommodate to his needs, to step back when he felt unsafe and Jaebum promised himself that he would return all favors earned.

Youngjae didn’t climb on top of him anymore, he knelt by his side and kept kissing his chest, just dry flutters of soft, warm lips and his hand dragged down to wrap around his thigh and as he squeezed and massaged it, Jaebum couldn’t help the soft moan and the way he spread them apart, just a notch. His eyes fell shut, his skin tingled. Every innocent press of Youngjae’s lips and every nudge of his fingertips had him gasp or sigh in response. But he wasn’t the only one. Youngjae’s panting was loud in his ears. Louder than it might have been in reality. The thought that he was aroused frightened him not just a little.

And it was that subtle uneasiness that had him right on edge. The constant push and pull of comfort and fear that never allowed him to fully relax, but at the same time kept him secure in the sheets. He shuddered in pleasure. Youngjae made a raspy noise and scooted closer. Not as urgent as before, but more intimate. He shoved his arm behind his back, between his shoulder and the bed until he could tangle his fingers in his hair again and propped himself on his elbow. His lips were moving up under his jaw and when he bared his teeth and nibbled on his jawbone, Jaebum’s hips bucked into thin air. And his other hand was still between his legs, rubbing the inside of his thigh, but never  _there_ .

Jaebum squirmed, he was hot and felt his cock twitch against his stomach and Youngjae made small noises in his ear. He kept a semblance of distance, just enough to keep his panic at bay and spike his arousal. Then he felt something else against his leg, Youngjae dragging his foot against his shin, his intoxicating touch spread out over the whole length of Jaebum’s body and he  _whimpered_ and Youngjae moved his hand up from its place between his legs, a fleeting, solid, sober motion, his palm sliding over his balls and up the length of his cock, all the way from the base, pressing it against his own stomach, an explosion of sensations after the long neglect and Jaebum fucking unraveled.

Just when Youngjae reached his tip, the ball of his hand pressing right under the head Jaebum shuddered wildly, he was certain he moaned deeply, thighs tensing and balls drawing tight and the most muted and yet most intense pleasure he ever felt took over his body, fogging his mind and clawing at his insides. He came in lon g white spurts all over his own belly and chest with Youngjae’s hand stopping in its tracks and staying pressed to his member, warm and comforting and he moaned sensually in his ear while Jaebum shivered violently through the high.

It took him a while to come to terms with his orgasm, breathing heavily with Youngjae’s hand flat, but with no pressure against his shaft and his lips against his neck. He felt very floaty, felt as if the bed was a lot softer now and Youngjae’s body a lot warmer and a lot closer, fleeting hints of fabric against his own bare skin. And he was shifting, squirming against Jaebum’s side, soft little pants against the skin of his neck and then he whispered and it was raspy and strained. “That was so fucking hot.” He murmured, “You’re so fucking hot.”

Jaebum’s chest swelled with warmth and confidence. “Thank you.” He whispered back and got a hold of Youngjae’s wrist, guiding him backwards until he was the one laying down. A simple ‘Thank you’ probably wasn’t enough, but Jaebum didn’t have the right words to explain. How badly he needed that. How desperately he needed to be the center of somebody’s attention. Someone who focused on him exclusively and willingly neglected their own needs. Someone who was warm and soft rather than wild and sexual and raw. Someone like Youngjae.

Jaebum reached out and cupped his bulge again. It strained against the fabric, thick and hard against his hand and Youngjae whined quietly. His eyes screwed shut and Jaebum pushed his face behind his ear, breathing his scent and listening to his sounds, lips grazing past his hairline. And he squeezed and Youngjae’s clothed hips rocked against him.

The zipper was harsh and unapologetic against Jaebum’s fingers but he still pressed back harder, felt along the seams and managed to trace the outline of his cock, digging his thumb and index as if he wanted to curl all around it. Youngjae squirmed and moaned desperately, but didn’t say anything. So Jaebum kept going. Youngjae’s jeans were as tight around his middle as they were around his fleshy thighs and hugging his bouncy ass. The denim felt rough against his sensitive palm and he reduced his rubbing, adding more pressure instead and Youngjae cried out and the whole length of his body tensed. Jaebum would have wondered if he were in pain if he didn’t push his hips up, grinding into his firm palm.

He moaned and cussed and rutted against the pressure of his hand and Jaebum felt so hot and if he’d been given ten minutes he would’ve gotten hard again. Instead he listened to Youngjae’s shuddering breath and felt his motions slow down until his hips stopped and only then he eased the pressure. “Did you come?” He asked quietly, a little surprised and a little turned on. Youngjae huffed and he felt his head bob in a nod.

Jaebum moved his hand up, closing his arm around his torso, closing his eyes, face still buried in his hair. He was very tired. And he didn’t like it at all that Youngjae wormed out of his embrace and scooted down the bed. An icy cold around his heart had his chest contract almost physically painful. He bit down on the insides of his lips to stay quiet. If Youngjae wanted to leave he wouldn’t say anything. He wouldn’t demand for him to stay. He would be reasonable about it.

What he hadn’t expected was Youngjae pulling his Shirt over his head and throwing it over the chair, then popping his jeans open and shimmying out of them, soon followed by his, probably very soiled underpants which he then carried to the bathroom. A moment later he heard water running and Jaebum rolled over until he was flat on his back again, staring at the ceiling, wondering if Youngjae was seriously washing his underwear right now.

When he came back he stopped in the middle of the room looking at him and Jaebum looked back. He noticed his eyes wander down his body slowly, then back up and down once more. He sprawled himself out and winked, watching his eyes squint with a grin. “You’re so insecure and so confident, how you do that?” He asked, then hopped on the bed and crawled up to him, falling down at his side and throwing a leg over him, ignoring the fact that his his thigh smudged through the mess of half-cried cum on his belly. Apparently his distaste for sticky messes was only in combination with clothing.

“I don’t need to be insecure with you anymore.” Jaebum answered with a long delay. “You were… great.” Youngjae’s warm and very naked body against him felt incredibly comforting. He hummed. “Can I ask you something?” He said quietly and Jaebum heaved a deep sigh. It wouldn’t be the first time someone asked him this. “No.” He muttered. “I’ve never been sexually assaulted.” “Ah… okay.” Youngjae muttered and added a soft. “Sorry.”

“’s okay.” Jaebum let him know and rolled them over wrapping his legs around him, feeling very snugglish now that Youngjae didn’t show any signs of leaving. “I’m checking out tomorrow morning, flying back to Seoul...” He said, with as much casualness as he could muster. Youngjae ‘huh’d. “Will you give me your number before we part?” It was silent for a while and Jaebum’s heart beat too fast. “Okay.”

  
  


  
  


  
  


Jaebum sat on the plane with mixed feelings. He didn’t have Youngjae’s number in his phone. Youngjae had his. He’d looked at him when the sunlight crept through the blends and they woke in a tangled mess of limbs. And Jaebum had spilled. “My father was an abusive alcoholic.” He’d explained with no context or reasoning. “It’s left me in a strange limbo of being equally terrified of and craving physical affection.” And Youngjae had swiped his hair out of his face and caressed his cheek, telling him that he looked pretty in the morning.

Then, when they parted in the hallway with Jaebum waiting for his colleague to attend breakfast together Youngjae had looked at him again. “Give me your number.” He’d said seriously. “I’m flying back next week. I don’t know how I will feel about you next week.” Then he’d left with Jaebum’s number in his phone and a sneaky kiss on his lips.

Jaebum came home with mixed feelings, glad to be in his own four walls and to sleep in his own bed and yet with a creeping notion of loneliness. He checked his phone often that day and the next and the one after that. And slowly, but surely the memory of Youngjae’s beautiful lips and warm hands became blurry and on the fourth day the painful hope of finding a message on his phone from an unknown number faded away. Instead he closed his eyes that evening and imagined gentle touches to his thighs and face and grabbed himself underneath the blankets.

It was Saturday afternoon and Jaebum lounged around on his sofa with a lingering headache and furry feeling in his stomach from one too many beers when his phone pinged.

He checked it and almost doubled over in a spike of adrenaline. “Are you free?” It said simply. The profile picture was of a small, fluffy white dog that looked adorable. “When?” He typed back with jittery fingers. “rn.” He frowned, but he still replied. “Yeah”

He blinked at the next message. “Cool. I need a ride. Pick me up from the airport.” Quietly he wondered if that person wasn’t Youngjae at all. Did someone have the wrong number? But he’d somehow already scrambled to his feet. “45 mins.” He answered. “Great. Get me at Starbucks.”

  
  


Almost an hour later Jaebum walked between the sitting booths at the airport and a black clad figure jumped to their feet upon seeing him. Youngjae looked entirely different. All black with a black face mask and sunglasses covering almost the entirety of his beauty. Jaebum couldn’t see it, but when he spoke he could hear the smile in it. “Hi Babe. Thank you.” And he threw his arms around Jaebum’s neck, completely oblivious to the stares they got left and right. He just so gave Youngjae a quick hug back, quietly confused and mildly embarrassed.

“Did I miss something?” He asked only after Youngjae had jumped onto his passenger’s seat, his luggage stored in the trunk all by himself as if they’d done this a million times. Finally Youngjae pulled his mask down and shoved his sunglasses up his forehead. He grinned. “I told you I wouldn’t know how I’d feel about you after a week.” He said and gestured with his hand. “It’s after a week and I feel like this.” Then he leaned forward and tapped around on the screen of his navigation system.

Jaebum pulled out of the Short-parking zone with the instructions given by the robo-voice from the navigation. Youngjae turned up the radio and hummed to the song playing, clapping the rhythm on his lap. Jaebum was too stunned to say much. What was happening? “Are… are you using me as a free taxi service?” He eventually managed to get out, an uncomfortable weight in his guts. Somehow he’d liked it more when Youngjae was openly indecisive and defensive about him.

Youngjae finished the chorus of the song before he answered. “I don’t consider it free.” He said. “I plan on paying you with an orgasm.” Jaebum sputtered. “I’m not a prostitute!” He revolted, fixing his eyes tightly on the road. Turning the volume of the radio down and turning to face him as Jaebum could see in the corner of his eye Youngjae answered. “Technically _I_ would be the prostitute. But aside from that… If you didn’t want to you wouldn’t have picked me up. I don’t do dating. I don’t do getting to know each other. Either we’re hook-ups or we’re boyfriends. And if you’re my boyfriend picking me up from the airport is common courtesy. And if you decide you don’t want to be my boyfriend after all you’ll have to dump me.”

It left Jaebum speechless. He’d found Youngjae outgoing and utterly direct. But this was certainly a little too much was it not? Then again, the first thing Youngjae had asked him privately was what position they should have sex in. So he was more than just a little direct. A sign on the road advertised a rest stop. “Well...” He cleared his throat. “Either way, it should be uhh… giving and taking, right? What do I get from being a nice boyfriend and picking you up from the airport?”

He glanced over to find Youngjae’s eyes glinting. “I told you, I’m gonna touch you again.” He said, voice suddenly a lot darker. “I’ve been thinking about that...” He trailed off dreamily. “Just wait until I have you in my place...” He promised and jerked a little when Jaebum pulled the steering around and drove off the highway to the parking lot of the rest stop. He drove to the end where the only car nearby was a truck with the curtains drawn shut and halted the car in a parking space.

“What are you doing?” Youngjae asked a little panicky and looked around hastily. “I’m not always like that you know?” He said, took his right hand off the steering wheel and brought it down to Youngjae’s lap without hesitation. His head whipped around. “I told you I’m not that pure.” He added, squeezing Youngjae over his loose fitting travel-sweatpants. He sucked in a harsh breath and his fingers dug into his forearm as he clutched it.

Jaebum felt his heat through his palm and it traveled from his arm through his entire body having his insides and cheeks heat up. It took barely a few rubbing motions to feel Youngjae twitch and plump up in his hand. “Not fair.” he gasped, but his eyes fell shut and his hips pushed back against him. “I’ve been horny all flight...” Jaebum pressed down firmly, squeezing him a lot easier than he had been able through the jeans, circling his shaft and dragging over his head precisely.

“You like it.” Jaebum noted, even though the whole bizarre situation had him harden in his own pants, especially when Youngjae moaned softly, head thrown back against the neck-rest and eyes shut in bliss. “You came so easily last time. Is it your thing to be jerked through your pants?” Jaebum questioned and continued to rub him relentlessly. “Fuck yeah.” Youngjae groaned, having him heat up another notch, ears burning like fire.

It took barely anything for Youngjae to shudder and come inside his pants with Jaebum’s hand squeezing him firmly. He gasped and panted heavily and it took a lot of self control of him to remove his grasp and put it back on the steering. “Jesus Christ.” Youngjae swore, tugging a bit on the front of his sweats. “I’ll have to change before picking Coco up from my brother’s.” He pouted and reached over to grab between Jaebum’s legs in return, but he swatted his hand away. “Hands off, I’m driving.” He chastised as he started the engine back up and left the parking lot.

“Coco?” He added, shifting in his seat to get a hold of his boner. “Haven’t you seen her in my picture?” Youngjae asked but his eyes were trained intently on him and his voice had some absence to the tone. Jaebum remembered the fluffy white dog and relaxed. For a moment there he’d had the ridiculous thought that Youngjae might have a strangely-named daughter. He realized that he didn’t know all that much about him at all. He wasn’t even sure he’d ever asked how old he was and only vaguely remembered something along the lines of ‘therapist’ as his profession. Well… at least he knew where he lived, he thought when he took the next turn by the instructions.

“Now you owe me an orgasm anyways. What’re you now gonna do to level out with the taxi call?” He threw sideways only after he’d gotten his hard-on to go down.

Youngjae huffed and pouted. “Was that weird… soft, romancey touchy sex like a gateway to your filthy soul?” He asked, ignoring the question. Jaebum shrugged. They rolled down a nice, smaller street with middle-sized apartment buildings and the navigation told him he’d reach his destination in 500 meters. “Guess only one way to find out.” He looked over. “Honey.”

**Author's Note:**

> WTF is that in the end? I had no plans. That's apparently what happens when I just come up with the plot AS I write. Like, from my brain to my fingers with no filter lol :D Whatever, main thing is they're cute and happy.


End file.
